Getting it in- I apologize in advance for the lunacy that's coming

Damn. This is one of two days of the week I don't actually have to wake up for anything and still I was awake at 6. Le sigh.

I'm taking a break from outlining moth genitalia to post before I forget and get caught up in my practice-dinner-grey's frivolity. (The moths are for a friend's senior project. I'm not that strange.)

Alas! I fear I have no real substantive thoughts at the moment, just lots of scattered ones. like....remember that post from a while back about things making way more sense in hindsight? yes, well, in hindsight, my first ever crush was on the original Pink Ranger from Power Rangers. didn't know it at the time, but it seems so obvious now. I also have a huge celeb crush on Kelly Clarkson, but that's a different story.

I was reading the Lost Symbol by Dan Brown the other day and almost stopped and angrily left the store twice because 1) he equated the purpose behind tattoos and drug use to transitioning. (maybe equated is a little strong, but it went something like this: tattooing is all about taking control of your carnal form- which is why so many people are getting tattoos or doing drugs or transgendering) WTF? I mean...maybe, on the level that I get tattoos to express things on the outside that I feel on the inside and transpeople change their bodies to match who they are on the inside...you have to read it. It's like, five pages in. I was upset. and tired at the time, so that didn't help.

Then his characters knocked Yale a handful of times (He went to Harvard), which also made me mad. The fact that this guy gives a talk about writing to the freshman at Exeter (where we both went to high school) is laughable. But I've always been a sucker for a little bit of plane-fiction now and then.

Blueberries are delicious. I've been eating them constantly since I gave my Mellon forum and ended up with my weight in left over indian food. So i've been using my lunch swipes for blueberries and pistachios. The ladies at durfee's think I'm crazy.

Are anyone else's allergies kicking into high gear? because I haven't sneezed as much in my whole life as I have today.

This is the song of my past two weeks. It's in my final project for Intro to Digital Video, which I will talk about next week after I hand it in. Figure its better that way. Also a huge sucker for Timbaland.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KDKva-s_khY

A Blind Man Can See How Much I Love You

One of my favorite ways to pass the time, especially when I don't have work or don't want to do it, is to hang out in Barnes and Nobles and read short stories. It works out brilliantly on all fronts. I feel less weird reading them in the bookSTORE where people generally pay for books. I can start a book of short stories and not finish them and that's ok, I can go back to it later. They tend to be cheaper if I do decide to buy them. They last about as long as my attention span. Basically, its great.

So today, I made my first trek to the bookstore for this purpose in a while with the intent of reading Amy Bloom's 'Where the God of Love Hangs Out'. Turns out she's got all kind of short stories, so after sitting on the floor and reading all the back covers, I settled on 'a blind man can see how much I love you'. I must say I was not disappointed, and I've only read the first two stories.

The first one was about a mother, Jane, and her ftm child, Jess. The story was beautifully written and was sharp and witty. It helps that Jess and Jane's relationship plays out the way a typical young man would interact with his mother, at least for the most part. I'll admit, I did get a little lost when the mother gained a love interest toward the end of the story, but I guess everyone deserves a happy ending while we're passing them around.

The second was about a woman undergoing cancer treatment with her husband and her lesbian best friend by her side. (I won't lie, I didn't finish this one because I was pressed for time). This story was still good but more of a downer. I found it hard to sympathize with the main character after reading Jane's story. But Bloom is a great writer, so it works all the same.

The last book of short stories I read was called "Both Ways is the Only way I want it" and it was a book full of mostly-downer stories. but it was SO GOOD. mm. I'm enjoying the memory of it.

Now I'm off to try to actually accomplish something.

pe@ce

Victory is mine!

My senior essay is in!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(letting that sink in for a moment)

And its great. That's why I didn't post on Thursday as is usually my jam. I have never spent so long working on footnotes in my entire life. DON'T LEAVE THOSE TO THE LAST MINUTE. it blows. I mean, don't leave the writing to the last minute either.

I'm ambivalent about my senior essay in a lot of ways. It's epic. I barely made it under the max word count of 15,000 (that's about 60 pages). So obviously I did a lot of work. But I'm also pissed because this was a two term essay most of the work for which was done literally in three to four weeks- over spring break and one week in both directions. So what did I do all fall? I did the work required of our seminar, but very little of that made its way into my paper ultimately. Sometimes I guess its just a long and windy road.

Speaking a little to the previous post, I had grand aspirations for this year and for the most part, I haven't been disappointed.
I've taken some awesome out-of-my-box classes, gotten more involved in JE life (well, until the last two weeks.), started doing this...I could keep going.
I guess my strategy was to let the awesome things find me. My perspective is undoubtedly skewed because as a varsity athlete there is a ton that I know I miss out on already, so now that I've got more time, that's the stuff I go to first. But I also know myself at least well enough to realize that even the stuff I'm really passionate about isn't going to get the right kind of energy if I've got to start it from the ground up. And its because my priorities are already set.
1)senior essay
2) classes generally
3) rowing
4) anything I've already promised myself to
5) new stuff I want to do.

see? It's pretty far down. And starting new things, as some teammates of mine discovered the hard way this term, is really hard as a senior unless you've got really enthusiastic and committed underclassmen to help you (or its a small enough project that you don't need that much help). There simply are a lot of other demands on you.

But my plan has worked admirably for me to this point. I got back into IM sports. I've done a better job generally of seeking out people I like but never get to see.
As for getting ready for next year, this AmeriCorp app I'm working on is a real pain in my ass. I'll admit that I was a little bummed when big-deal-consulting-firm-x fell through, but I think in hindsight I would have hated that. (You should totally attend the info sessions because the finger food is quite tasty. and you get free notebooks and pens, which I'm sure excites me more than most people) So I turned my mind towards smaller companies, or doing some non-profit work, which is how I ended up at AmeriCorp (so much more than TFA- check it out). I think whats most important is to just stay relaxed. Stress isn't going to make anything better, it just makes you unhappy. I'm lucky because I know at least that I'm moving in with my heterosexual life partner after graduation. So all I really need to do is find a way to pay my rent. At the very worst I see myself as the only personal trainer with a Yale degree. But let's be honest....I get paid solid money to yell at people and get free gym access. I'm not sure it gets much better either.

I'm letting my mind decompress for a couple more hours before I frantically make up lost time in my digital video class. Joy.


also, before I forget. CREDIT/D CREDIT/D CREDIT/D. You can take 4 classes Cr/d/Fail. USE THEM! It means you can take something you are interested in but terrible at, or something totally random. Or if you're like me, it takes you course load down from 4 to 2. sort of. my point it, take advantage of it.

Good Morning!

I've always been a morning person. I enjoy having the full day ahead of me to work and relax, and, thanks to rowing and a full day of classes and meetings and stuffing myself to oblivion at dinner, I'm pretty much non-functional after 10pm. Yes, this makes me a terrible college student.
Anyhow, in honor of the work I have to get done today, my post will likewise be short, but will include some fun things to keep everyone occupied.

Every morning, in addition to the boring stuff like getting dressed and brushing my teeth I visit the following website:

www.woot.com- one day, one deal. it's terrible because i have no money to shop but sometimes they are just giving the stuff away and I can't help it.

www.crossfit.com- as much as I'm married to rowing, I'm excited to get to do this full time. Endorphin high for hours

Yu+Me- I haven't the slightest clue how I found this originally anymore. It's a pretty decent lesbian webcomic, and at the very least it is really well drawn. (said as an uncritical reviewer of art)

Khaos!- This I found from Yu+Me. It's a GLBT webcomic, and while it doesn't update as frequently, its definitely my favorite of the two.

VolumeVote- This is a cool site I just found that offers a free mp3 every day. Sometimes it's well known awesome stuff (Bad Romance) and other times its unexpected/unknown awesome stuff.

I mean, I also check the weather and look at the NYTimes headlines. But I figure those five ought to keep enough people distracted for the time being. : D

Time for breakfast! It is, after all, the most important meal of the day.

And Happy Spring Break everyone (especially those of you who are leaving the Have)